Eulogy for a Coffee Mug,

The KeyCite Mug we all knew and loved is gone. Our friend and constant companion was lost to us yesterday after an accidental fall to the ground, which resulted in its shattering into four large piec....I can't go on.

It was sleek, black and beautiful in its singular efficiency of carrying hot or cold beverages. Key's handle was not what we would describe as ergonomic, but was effective in keeping the heat of the contents from reaching your cool hand (or opposite for chilled drinks), and fit in its friend's, the Subie's, cup holder with grace and confidence.

KeyCite Mug was made in the United States of America about three years ago and entered service as a free gift from the WestLaw subsidiary to the Honolulu law firm of Watanabe, Ing, Kowashima, and Komeji, now known as Watanabe, Ing and Komeji.

Who would have known what lie ahead for the little mug and who would guess the worldliness it would attain in its brief life.

The mug was given to rookie paralegal, Priscilla Hampton during her first and only year at the firm working for Doug Ing. She, in turn, re-gifted it to me, her fiance at the time.

The mug served in the Navy side by side with me during my tour as Navigator on the USS HOPPER. Its exemplary service was noteworthy during numerous training exercises including SHAREM 188 off the coast of Kuaii, sound silencing survey off the coast of San Clemente, where, under adverse conditions, it helped to keep me awake for 26 hours. It stood numerous watches as we headed east through the Strait of Malaca and Hormuz, filled with a concoction of strong coffee and cocoa powder, which is known to dissolve cups of less substantial caliber. It was left stranded on the bridge of the ship for many hours, growing God-knows-what and yet it remained stoic, upright and unstolen. My reputation for a surley disposition after a long watch would not be complete without that mug in hand.

It rode most mornings with me up to ATGPNW Headquarters in Everett, Washington. It handled the gentle caresses of the lady baristas at the Metropolitan Market who loved it so, with dignity and professionalism. It followed dutifully with me as we crossed the great American Southwest Desert together and into the chaos of hurricane Rita. Continuing on we reached points further east including Potomac, MD and Cape May, NJ before settling in Buffalo, NY.

Aged, but not faded, it made one final trip to Hawaii last December. A homecoming that marked its certain circumnavigate of the globe.

Only days away from retirement (but never "replacement") it fell out of Donna's Subaru in the parking lot of the Chautauqua Institution and struck the ground with a sickening crash. Mugologists worked around the clock to repair the vessel, but doubted it could ever hold liquid again without leaking or giving me cancer from the glue used to make it whole.

KeyCite is survived by friends The Subie. The Bill O'Riley, and the Bob Edwards, Morning Edition Mugs. It never even met Wegman's Coffee Adventures Mug, which came into my life this morning sprung from the idea which was pregnant in my mind before the accident.

The family requests in lieu of flowers, Starbucks Gift Cards be sent to me, so I may properly raise young Wegman in a life rich in grande half-caf, whole milk, extra-hot, no-pump with raw cane sugar and a dash of cocoa lattes.

KeyCite, you will be missed.